Wednesday, 27 April 2011

Back to my comfort zone

Thanks for your comments ladies. Yes strange how many emotions can be experienced in a short space of time.
Yesterday I was back to work allbeit only for three days but it certainly is where I function well.
Always playing catch up but I don't miss too many deadlines. Would like to be able to delegate more but heh can't have everything.

I have been advised to get some liquid support- no not alcohol but tonic. Anyone got any recommendations?
Metatone and Seven Seas are two that have been mentioned. I once tried pro plus but had to be scraped off the ceiling so don't like them one bit!! And I have heard some strange stories about Red Bull !!!

I am starting with a lovely cold today so I hope it doesn't develop for the wedding on Saturday. Don't want to drown out the vows with my sniffing. Although I am sure I will shed a tear. I have been with Elaine and Jim from day one of their relationship and I couldn't be happier with the final outcome.

Dreams do come true as my friends frequently prove...............................

Monday, 25 April 2011

Time out- not always useful............

Having time off work leads to plenty of time to think. Sometimes good sometimes not.

Such a variety of happenings since I was last at work  just over a week ago:
  • White water rafting
  • Pamper days
  • Girly days with Julie
  • Deep sadness at the loss of a friend
  • Trouble sleeping
  • Taking time to consider my future
  • Supporting a friend whose sister may not survive
  • Criticism about my treatment of Phil?
All this whilst trying to fill the hours with "normal" things.

So it started on a high and slowly I began to sink.  Events just took me there.
I have to lift myself again and back to work tomorrow. I know I will be fine. But I do have to think more about what lifts me up and what drags me down.

Certainly the criticism from a friend of Phil's has affected me more than I want to admit. I was angry at first but now I just think he is one of so many who have no concept of what my life is like. And I feel sorry for him .........

Next week will be a mixture too:

Three days back at work then:

Manicure and pedicure ready for Saturday
Elaine and Jims wedding
Scrapping with Sam
Liverpool with Carol Ann and Sara
Joyces funeral at the same place where my Mums was

Then back to the usual routine which if I am honest is probably better for me.

Plenty of time to think is not always a good thing......................................................

Thursday, 21 April 2011

Bye Joyce love you .........

Our close friend Joyce lost her battle with leukaemia yesterday. I can't get my head around it. We would sit until the early hours listening to Beatles music and trying to fix the world. Love you Joyce and yes we WILL celebrate your life xxxxx

Sunday, 17 April 2011

Exceeded expectations

White water rafting was so amazing. I was so scared when I first got into the boat. I was so touched that all my friends wanted to look after me. I was so grateful that they needed ballast in the middle of the boat which I was happy to provide. I really don't know how I could have sat on the edge of the boat and paddled.
God was looking down yesterday and decided that because I had been brave enough to even turn up for the love of my friend that he would give me an "easy" ride.
Having said that it wasn't exactly easy being in the middle with nothing to hold onto but I wedged my feet in  and when the guide  said "down" I gathered my friends in and held on for dear life.
It was so cold and we spent a lot of time under the water. My closest friends  me will know that for very personal reasons I hate water. I don't swim but even though my Dad was a good swimmer it didn't help him.

So I am awarding myself the medal of extreme valour.

I did it and am glad I did but don't feel the need to ever do it again. There will be some fabulous photos soon.

What can be next on my list of extreme activities. Any suggestions????

Wednesday, 13 April 2011

Still waiting

Watching the post for my results. I have been too busy to think about it until now. I am still busy but winding down to a week and a half off.
I do hope that I get my marks through soon. Everyone is telling me I will have passed but until I see it in black and white I am still nervous.

Talking about nervous I am white water rafting this weekend and I should be nervous. Do you know what is worrying me most - getting into the wet suit!!!
I have never been graceful and really don't fancy wetting myself laughing before we even get into the "boat"?

This may be my swan song as far as extreme activities is concerned as my body is really telling me to take it easy so I really want to go out on a high. Watch this space folks.........................

Sunday, 3 April 2011

Friendship - a gift to give and receive

I am lucky enough to have loyal and loving friends. Thanks ladies for your comments. I value the love and support that I am blessed with and which keeps me sane.
Yes She next friday we will start our first retreat of the year. My bags are packed already! It is the best therapy in the world. I can be totally ME.........And the company is not bad either!!  and the food is .......mmmmm
Looking forward to 1st May too Sam and our scrapping and nattering session. More nattering than scrapping I am sure when us three get together.
In between  I have white water rafting and Elaine and Jim's wedding. Lovely stuff...........................

Saturday, 2 April 2011

Shift of priorities

Since before Christmas my focus has been on finishing my dissertation. As a result my role of carer to Phil has been secondary. Not in a bad way though. I think it has done us both good and he seems to be more aware of my "other" priorities in life.
Each time I make an observation and say it out loud something happens to change it. I really hope that this stays the same. It is good to be considered even if only fleetingly.
My career (which I never planned) has taken another turn and where I was recently yearning to retire I now relish my new challenge.
I have had a day off this week and truthfully at the end of the day I realised how much time I waste if I am not focussed.

So it was prophetic when I added to the title of my blog. I am not only carer to a brain injury survivor but many many other things. And they all deserve to be encompassed in my very full life.

     I am Trish

and I just happen to be a carer right now but no longer will that hold me back. I have a lot of living still to do and I believe I will be a better happier person for it.

Only my friends and family will let me know..............................