Off to therapy

Today is therapy day and I always dread it. For those of you who know me you will remember that I struggle with actually discussing my situation with professionals without breaking down. Even after more than seven years of this life!! I can talk to my friends all day because they know and love me but talking to a therapist (remembering that I am a trained counsellor myself) does not come easy!!!! So I always have my hair done, make sure I look tidy, make a plan to go shopping afterwards to lift my spirits and then drive to Colwyn Bay hoping for the best.

The programme we are following is called Acceptance and Commitment. My mantra is "quiet acceptance" but the commitment part is hard. I so admire all those full time carers out there. Just for the few hours of the day when I am in carer mode I struggle so to have to do it all day every day well God love them and keep them safe.
I pray that I won't need to be where they are but if it happens I really don't know that I will succeed.

I am very much more positive with many things to look forward to but the danger is that at the end of the day Phil has the power to destroy all my plans. He seems to have a few physical problems just now that he is avoiding talking about but I can tell that he is worried about a couple of things. I will just gently probe to see if I can get him to talk about it.

But for today I will go and get some support for me and then shop -so really that is their therapy and mine. I know that at least one of them works really well............................................................................